From the following link located right here.

"Daria" is not forgotten. Not yet.

Here it is. To make everyone feel better, I'll review "Trent's Girl" by Minkychan over at fanfiction.net. This might be the same "Minkychan" from DeviantArt.com and possibly could be the person posting as "JennaUserName".

So is it my task to afflict the comfortable? Or comfort the afflicted? Should I give this story from a fanfiction.net amateur a good old-fashioned, CINCGREEN thrashing?

Answer: no. The story does not deserve a thrashing. What saves it from being a pedestrian relationshipper is that the story is told from the POV of Monique, Trent Lane's on-again, off-again girlfriend who, in the first three seasons of "Daria", serves as one of the barriers to Daria and Trent getting together, just one barrier among many.

It's always interesting, if only for a little while, to see how a writer approaches a Class C character like Monique -- one of those characters who makes infrequent apparances and about whom you don't know much. In the beginning of her long career as Daria fanfic fodder, she was (informally) known as "Evil Monique", because it was so tempting to give the bare outline of Monique some flesh by making her the evil impediment to Daria AND TRENT HOOKING UP 4 EVAH!!! (Sorry. As Wavy Gravy said at Woodstock, "Don't read from the brown fanfic.")

It has only been recently than anyone tried to give Monique some real motivation. The Angst Guy wrote some background for Miss M. in "Smoking Mirror", and I felt he good job, so good that it might have precluded any new approaches. (Did I get that title right? So much fanfic, so little conscious memory of any of it.)

Minkychan adds a new twist. When given a character like Monique, we're not left with much to work with. In those cases, we use the vocal cues of the voice actor and try to build a personality out of five seconds of vocal straw. Most of the portrayals of Monique have been of this strong, confident teen. (She sings! She writes music! She looks punk and has a piercing! And she likes Trent, so she obviously has good taste. So sayeth the relationshipper.)

Instead, for whatever reasons, Minkychan writes Monique as a character who dreams that someday, she can be Mrs. Monique Lane. She is actually very content with having Trent as a boyfriend, who no matter what, has always come back to her. In this brief snippet, Monique dreams of the future.

When we're famous, we won't have to worry about gossip magazines pairing us up with random artists we work with.

"The Lanes are deeply in love," the tabloids will say, "Hollywood has never seen such a loving, faithful couple in show business before!"

It makes Monique sound more like a young woman with young woman dreams than some sort of perfect, poised rock musician, which was a rather charming read for a change.

However, Monique might not keep her peace of mind for long. To find out more, go read it. Trust me, type fanfiction.net and you'll find it there somewhere.

As for critique, one thing Minkychan needs to know how to do is to write a real paragraph. Remember, a paragraph is a set of statements loosely bound together by a common theme, like cats trapped in a lasso. Instead of paragraphs, we have a bunch of sentences wandering off by themselves, and looking quite alone. She's asking for a beta reader.

Get to it. But first, ask for fan art. We like fan art around here. Preferably nude art (or, in some cases, nude penguin art). But failing that, any old "Daria" art will do.

People keep writing hoping there's going to be another post, but there isn't going to be another post, so GO AWAY!!

Which leads me to a question: "why don't Daria fans just...you know...talk to each other?" Say, on the phone, or in person? I mean...how much does it cost to reach out to someone as opposed to refreshing a message board 50 times in a row hoping that someone will post something...anything! I mean, you just grab the computer and bang your head against the wall and just want to scream, "POST YOU FUCKING BASTARDS!! POST!! POST!!! AAAAAARRGGGGGHHHH!!!"

And then your wife complains because she can't hear the TV.

So I decided I'd relate my idea called "The Daria Tree". "The Daria Tree" consists of fans that you have either a) visited, or b) called on the telephone. No, instant messaging does NOT count, even if you spent five hours with another Daria fans on AIM bitching that you were going to run away from home because your Mom made you wash the dishes...or something.

Let's see who is in my "Daria Tree":

I have actually visited (or had visit me):

* Ruthless Bunny (DUH.)
* medea42 (so who remembers her?)
* Mr. Anonymous (so who remembers him?)
* Wraith (Met him at an anime convention Mr. A dragged me to -- but anime conventions aren't that burdensome. In fact, the fans are reaaaaaaaaaaaaly interesting, the way that the monkeys are really interesting at the zoo.)
* Leopard Lady (so who remembers her? Met her briefly in New York City.)
* ahmygoddess (yes, I've met the man)
* E. A. Smith (ditto)
* kaimefarlove (I hope I spelled that right)
* Father Martin (got a chance to host the man during his US tour)

I have actually talked on the phone with:

* Mike Xeno (during the aborted "Padded Walls" project)
* Greybird (regarding DFB stuff)

I *suspect* I have talked on the phone with:

* The Angst Guy (but my memory is real hazy and that might not be true)

So first: who have you actually MET? Or spoken to on the phone? Remember..instant messaging and chatrooms does NOT count.

I call this idea "The Daria Tree" because if one had that software that could draw lines and squiggles and things you could connect Daria fans via a line of contacts. Unfortunately, I don't have that software. I could draw such a picture and scan it -- but I don't have a scanner. Maybe I'd just shove it against the computer screen and if everyone squinted very hard, they could see it.

And if you've spoken to these people for the purposes of phone sex, I don't want to hear about it. (Unless you send me private e-mail, then I want to know all about it so I can laugh at these people behind their backs.)

Anyway, here's your October post. Now where's my money?